Excerpts from He Is Faithful from A to Z
...“April has written of her life experiences with honesty and integrity, as she lays bare the agonies and ecstasies of life in a manner that is both candid and transparent.”
Excerpt From
He is faithful from A to Z
(Foreword)
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made… (Psalm 139:13-14)
"...The next few minutes were undoubtedly the darkest few minutes that I have ever experienced in my entire life. To relay them in words would be the most difficult of tasks ever set before me, but I will try. As the radiographer moved the cold rolling instrument over my belly and together, we stared at the snowy, black and white image on the screen, she smiled and small talked as she went back and forth, back and forth. I on the other hand heard nothing but the sound of my own heartbeat that seemed to desperately want to jump right out of my chest. All I could see was a deathly stillness and though my face had become a still, blank stare, tears had already begun to fall. I’d had enough experience to know what a baby in the wombs heart beat sounds like and looks like during an ultrasound. Here, there was no noise and no movement. There was no heartbeat. There was only stillness, life-less stillness. The radiographer mentioned something about the silly machine and that she would go and get the doctor. She left the room and immediately I felt so incredibly alone.
So, I cried out to my God albeit softly but with the desperation of a loud, earnest plea. Surely, He was there with me. Tears still fell silently and I began to dart my focus back and forth, between the blank screen, to the ceiling (and Heavens above) praying desperate prayers, and wondering how this miracle might play out. Would the silly machine find the baby’s heartbeat waking her from her still sleep? Would I pray out loud and watch in awe as two non-believers witnessed death turn to life before their very eyes? As I waited for the return of the radiographer and the doctor I just continually asked for God to help me. I’m not even sure what I meant by that.
A few minutes later the two experts entered the room like crashing waves on a tossing sea of turmoil, the taller one of the two quickly taking a turn of the transducer probe. As it became more and more apparent that there was in fact no little heart beating in my womb, the voice of the doctor shattered any hope I had, of the playing out of any miracle in that room. “I’m so sorry” he mouthed, but..."
Excerpt From
He is faithful from A to Z
(Chapter 7 - G is for Grace, Anna Grace)
I am the vine. You are the branches. Those who live in me while I live in them will produce a lot of fruit. But you can’t produce anything without me. (John 15:5 GW)
"...Yet, that was then and this was now and here I was, crying on a bath mat, still feeling stripped of everything, still waiting to be resurrected.
The crashing waves in my life were one thing and they were some seriously big circumstantial waves that were crashing down on my life, truly tossing me about. But the faithlessness, the inability to fight and the realisation that I had nothing left in or of myself was another thing altogether. All of this was a lot to deal with. I cannot express enough that it really felt like I was dying inside. I knew God’s love for me and I knew He had even promised that I would rise again but with faith and hope absent, gifts within me lying dormant, regret and self-pity my new friends, I really did feel like that bird – laying there, dead as a doornail. One thing was for sure. This certainly would be a testimony to talk about. God would surely be given all the praise and glory for this resurrection as there was no way that I could possibly do this myself. I had nothing. And that is why this,
is a testimony of His faithfulness..."
Excerpt From
He is faithful from A to Z
(Chapter 26 - Z is for Zero, Zip, Zilch)
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